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Life for me…

Life for me…
 

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I often joke that I am “in the closet” when it comes to a lot of woo woo stuff. Mind you, I have been on this path for a while. I’m not a pro, but I am not brand new either. I feel like I started to get into more woo woo subjects about 14 years ago. So I have felt my awkward shaky first baby steps and I have decided I have grown to the puberty stage of my woo woo development. Hear me out! By that, I mean that I feel like I am ready to spread my wings and move on and experience it all, but I still need a lot of guidance, like a typical teenager.

 

Now back to the “in the closet” statement. I feel like I can be myself around my friends outside of work, but I don’t know about you, but I spend approximately 40 hours a week at my job and I can’t exactly talk as freely as I would like to there. I have had many jobs over the years. (That is an understatement….)  I usually try to be “on” as I call it, which means being perky and pleasant and not being the real me which can be confrontational and blunt, even though I don’t mean to come across that way. I have also been told I have no poker face, so everything I am thinking comes across on my face. This is my curse in life, because I would like to say I am always thinking of unicorns and rainbows, but more often than not, I’m not. And it shows!

I think a lot of people aren’t comfortable being their real selves at work for whatever reasons. Let’s just be honest; people are judgmental, including myself, even though I do try to squash that bad habit. I like to wake people up, although I don’t just burst on the scene and scream my truth. I will drop hints, here and there, to see if they are receptive. Then I can open up and throw a little more mind bending topics in there like…..so how do you feel about intergalactic space travel? People who get to know me, know that I am a little “off” or eccentric, so if I will say something crazy, they write it off as….oh, that’s just her.  I have noticed, being a little “crazy” or eccentric, I can get away with a lot more. There is more leeway if I say something that completely befuddles someone. I have also noticed, I joke around so much, that if I say something really bewildering or out there, usually with a straight face, often people think I am still joking. I will let them be the final judge on that for themselves.

I like to hope that I have opened some people’s minds. Maybe just one person, but isn’t that worth it? Also, I wonder, if some other people in the woo woo closet will see me being out there and living my truth, will it compel them to speak more about their woo woo thoughts and ideas? Who’s with me? Let’s plane a woo woo parade, like Gay Pride? What would the flag look like? And what would we wear? Skyclad, anyone? Anyway, I digress…..when I look at it, I really try to surround myself with open minded people. That helps.

Even if you have just one person you can tell the most wonderful, insane things to, that heals the soul. With all the others, I still try, day to day, to put little things out there, like little woo woo bombs. Tiny, sweet cherry bombs of deep thought that burst with flavor!  I think what has also helped is that I am also lucky that I am in a medium sized city with more than one traffic light. We have a University in town, which brings in a lot of open minded thinkers to town and brings up the energy. So even though I might not appreciate the University on game days due to traffic, I am appreciative they are here, bringing in young and fresh ideas!

My family, my woo woo sisterhood, are still in a small town…bless their hearts! They experience the pressure of small town life with everyone trying to be in everyone’s business. (Sorry….judgmental, I know…)They experience the feeling of…..if I speak frankly, will it embarrass other members of the family that care about a reputation as down to earth everyday people. (I guess we can come across as airy fairy!) In a nutshell, I feel like I can pretty much be me, but I can completely understand being closeted or fearful of speaking your truth and being shunned, but honestly, I read more and more everyday that people are believing in New Age concepts. Slowly, ever so slowly, they are coming forward. We can be the ones to light the way….with fairy lights and pixie dust! Weeeeee!

-Secret Sister 4

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